How do we Respond if we are not Chosen for a Desirable Opportunity?

Have you ever really wanted something but were never quite able to get there?

Someone else was chosen for the position at work. Another person was asked to take the open place on the team. An opportunity with limited spots went to someone else instead of you. I have been there. I imagine many of us have. After being passed over, do we stick with our pursuit or let it go?

In reading the book of Acts, I recently came across a person who was passed over, not only once but twice!

Barsabbas (not to be confused with Barnabas who worked with Paul or Barabbas the Revolutionary) was a follower of Christ from the very beginning. We know this because it is what qualified him to be in the running to fill the vacant spot among the ranks of the apostles. In Acts 1:21, Peter addressed the brand new Church about selecting someone to take Judas’ place. (After betraying Jesus, Judas ended his own life due to the weight of his choice.) Peter said they should choose someone who had followed Christ from the time of his baptism until the present. Barsabbas was one of two men nominated for consideration.

While we see the stories of how Jesus called several of the disciples throughout the Gospels, John McArthur points out in his book Twelve Ordinary Men there was a specific moment when the apostles were selected (Luke 6:12-13). Many people were following Jesus regularly as disciples. There were enough of them for Jesus to send out seventy-two disciples to evangelize in various communities (Luke 10:1). Sometime after this, Jesus selected twelve to be the men who he poured into more intentionally. These would be the men whom he would equip to train and grow the Church after his ascension.

Based on what we see in Acts 1:21, Barsabbas would have been part of the original selection pool for apostleship as well.

However, for reasons unknown to us, Jesus didn’t choose him. Fast forward to Acts 1 after Jesus ascended into Heaven. Barsabbas is still there. He has not fallen away despite all that has happened in the three-plus years of Jesus’ ministry. 

Now, he has a second chance to become part of the inner circle. Prayers were prayed and lots¹ were cast to determine if it would be Barsabbas or Mathias who would take Judas’ place. The selection did not go Barsabbas’ way. He was passed over yet again.

How many of us would have given up at this point?

Frustration about all I had given up and sacrificed for the cause would have been in my heart. Questions about my worthiness, defensive arguments about why I was the better candidate, and criticisms about the person who was selected would come easily to me. 

Scripture doesn’t tell us Barsabbas’ reaction. However, Church history holds he became a Bishop in the early Church and was martyred for his faith. This would indicate no matter what Barsabbas might have felt in the immediate aftermath of the selection process, he ultimately chose to continue following the call of Christ.

Barsabbas’ story challenges me.

As a writer, I have submitted articles for Christian publications repeatedly and have been passed over repeatedly. I have not been chosen for certain ministry opportunities. I have been skipped for potential leadership roles. While all of these instances have come with a level of disappointment, what ultimately matters is my response. Will I choose to keep walking in my calling with a humble heart, even if I am never recognized or rewarded for it?

How do you typically respond when you are passed over for an opportunity or position you really want and/or feel qualified for? Are you tempted just to give up and walk away? Does bitterness come knocking at your door, calling you to close off your heart? What would it look like to keep on your path, with a humble heart, trusting God’s plan for your life instead?